POOP READING
Mar 26, 2010

Earlier this week, Vice President Joe Biden was overheard saying "This is a big fucking deal!" to President Barack Obama during a live TV event announcing the passage of the new health care bill. It was simply another in a long line of verbal blunders by Biden, who once told paraplegic Senator Chuck Graham to "stand up," and just recently on St. Patrick's Day asked for God's blessing for the "late" mother of the Irish Prime Minister, a woman who was not actually dead. And the list of gaffes doesn't end there...

Additional Gaffes Made by Joe Biden

—Absent-mindedly started masturbating during the State of the Union. (Mike)

—Keeps tipping his waitress in the Amtrak bar car with colonial scrip from the Smithsonian. (Jameson)

—Suggested that his Republican colleagues should support gays in the military "because they'll die faster that way." (Tenessa)

—While giving White House tours, regularly references the movie Body Heat when describing the life of Eleanor Roosevelt. (Matt)

—Accused the Chinese ambassador of "going peepee in my Coke." (Joe)

—Let's just say he's not going to be allowed to visit or talk about Bangkok again for quite some time. (Brandon)

—Playfully kicked Lindsay Vonn in the shins before her last run in the Super G at the 2010 Olympics. (Mike)

—Keeps trying to get Obama to reenact the jive-talking scene from Airplane. (Tenessa)

—Once ate an entire party sub at a Darfur hunger strike. (Matt)

—Got shitfaced at the White House "Beer Summit." (Joe)

—Wore his wife Jill's gown to the Inaugural Ball. (Mike)

—At a formal dinner with the British Prime Minister, he used his dinner fork to eat his salad, his salad fork to eat his dinner, and his dessert fork to stab a diplomat in the throat. (Tenessa)

—Once referred to 24's Dennis Haysbert as "the first black president." (Matt)

—Got tossed out of the annual Vice Presidents' leg-wrestling tournament on the White House lawn for fighting dirty, including "groin stuff." (Joe)

—Stood in line on opening night to see that new Gerard Butler/Jennifer Aniston movie. (Mike)

—Showed up for a speech at the NAACP in blackface. (Tenessa)

—Up until a couple years ago, he still rolled and pinned his jeans. (Matt)

—Posted Michelle Obama's driver's license photo and current weight on his Facebook page. (Jameson)

—After happening upon Osama bin Laden at a Wendy's in Wilmington, Delaware, he foolishly agreed to let bin Laden turn himself in. (Mike)

—Once invited Barney the Dinosaur and Frank Stallone to stand behind Barney Frank at an important press conference. (Matt)

—Constantly crafts off-color jokes using of the last names of Attorney General Eric Holder, Secretary of Energy Steven Chu, and Secretary of Agriculture Tom Vilsack. (Brandon)

—Publicly identified The Phantom Menace as his favorite Star Wars movie. (Tenessa)

—Always refers to Dianne Feinstein as "The Hot Hebrew." (Matt)

—During a climate change conference, unveiled a chart of eastern African ungulate population trends that was displayed upside down (this, of course, became known as his infamous "Giraffe Graph Gaffe"). (Joe)

—Keeps inviting Obama to take a steam together so he can "see if the Presidential genitals came from mom's side or dad's side." (Mike)

Baron von Contributors: Tenessa Gemelke, Brandon Kruse, Matt Kruse, Joe Mulder, Jameson Simmons, Mike Wagner

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